A Special Delivery From Heavenly Father

One night before Kinsey was born, Gary was at a church meeting and got the distinct impression that the baby that I was carrying would be a girl. He came home and told me that he knew Heavenly Father was sending me someone special and that we would be friends.

On April 17, 1995 this cute girl joined our family. She has been my sassy little defender for as long as I can remember. Gary was right. Heavenly Father did send me someone special.

I love you, Kinsey Elizabeth. Happy 16th birthday!

What Would You Do?

Suppose you were part of a small group of people in charge of an activity for children ages 3 - 11.

Suppose you had a child who finds pleasure in hiding from you while you are helping to be in charge of said activity.

Suppose child hides with lightening speed and you can't locate him for several minutes.

Suppose this child has special needs and doesn't understand that running into the street is not a good idea.

Suppose that several more minutes go by while you are frantically looking for this child.

Suppose after getting frantic you start crying because you have lost your child and wander through the halls of the church bawling.

Suppose several people saw this and started to help you look for him.

Suppose these people found him in the most likely of places...the egg hunt...because duh! that's the first place you should look.

Suppose you had already looked there twice.

Suppose this caused you to look stupid along with having red eyes from crying.

What would you do?

I have decided to hide in my house and never go to church again.

It seems like yesterday...

Happy Birthday, Christopher James. I love you!

Parenting at it's finest

Last night I NEEDED a bite of chocolate chip cookie dough so I went to get it out of the fridge.

IT WAS GONE!!!

I immediately went crazy and started blaming everyone in the family all the while knowing in my heart of hearts who had done it.

I told Gary that I bet the bowl was up in Jared's room so I marched up the stairs (cue the stomping music). I asked Jared where the cookie dough was and he pulled the empty bowl out from under the chair in his room. I started smacking him as he said "what...it was MY cookie dough."

He followed me down the stairs (cue the angry stomping music) telling me how it was HIS cookie dough because HE had made it. I kindly pointed out that he used OUR ingredients...the ones that WE had paid for. Jared has never learned when to keep his mouth shut so he said "You mean the ingredients that DAD paid for!"

Did you hear it? Did you hear the screech in the background music? Did you hear all the birds and crickets quit chirping at the exact second that he said "that DAD paid for"?!

I gave him the "I quit working outside of the home the day Chris was born and maybe I haven't gotten a paycheck in the last nineteen years but don't you dare say that I haven't worked and that the money that Dad makes is not mine just as much as it is his" lecture!

Like I said, Jared has not learned when to shut his mouth so he just kept going with the "but it's Dad's money" line. I glared at Gary and he finally spoke up and told Jared to apologize to his mom.

"Soorrryyyy, Mom" as his eyes rolled around in his head.

I smacked him again, called him a male chauvinist pig, and told him he better change his thinking if he ever wanted a wife!

Then I put myself in time-out!

Now, I need some chocolate!

I hope they call me on a mission...

Chris got his mission call today! He is going to the Argentina Buenos Aires North mission. He goes into the MTC August 17. This is what some of our friends had to say:

Jesse Duncan: Congratulations, Warburtons! Exciting.

Carolyn Nielson: Yay!!! So exciting!

Gail Westcott: What a blessing it is to serve a mission. Tell Chris the Westcott's say congratulations.

Rachael Klinker: Very nice!

Darla Scoles: The Scoles say congratulations too!!!! How exciting!

Sheyenne Alvarez: How exciting!

Annie Werneking: Very exciting! Congratulations!

Rebecca Cothran: Congratulations!!

Karin Salisbury: Congratulations!!!! What a great blessing!!!

Anna Davies: Happy time for all of you! Good job, Mom and Dad (and Chris)!

Tabetha Roan: That is so cool!

Debbie Pratt: Woohoo! Spanish speaking, right?

Judy Bowden: Yeah!!! We are so happy to hear that Chris goes to Argentina. I'm sure he'll do a great job!

Rose Gaertner: Congratulations!!!!

Jenifer Hopkinson Smullin: Yay!!!!! Congrats! That is very exciting!

Tianna Sahim: Congratulations...He will be a great missionary.

Judy Wolter: That's so exciting. Now you can focus your worries to one country instead of the entire world! :)

Cynthia McCloskey: How exciting for him and your family! Congrats...

Kirsten Schwendiman: Definitely exciting! Congratulations from the Schwendimans. :)

Carol Dawson: WOW!!!!! How cool! Ceth comes home in July! Longest 2 years of my life!!!!!!!! But what a wonderful man he has become! Chris will be AWESOME! Tell him the Dawson fishing/hunting clan said "Fishers of men...REEL 'EM IN BABY!!!!"

MyLinda Butterworth: That is wonderful. I can't believe Chris is old enough to go on a mission already. I remember when he was getting baptized.

Lisa Peart: My sister went there. How exciting!

Stephanie Tietjen: How exciting!!! I've heard that Buenos Aires is a beautiful city. I think you and Gary had better get passports for your 20th anniversary. :-)

Jan Swanson: Oh my goodness!!! YAY and congratulations! That will be a tremendous blessing to those in Argentina, as well as to Chris.

Thanks everyone! It's a Spanish speaking mission. I've already looked up the murder rate in Argentina, what kind of natural disasters occur there, where he should go in case of a tsunami, what part of town he should avoid at night and what kind of fevers I should worry about...Dengue and yellow. Oh, and no one guessed Argentina so I will have to pay my own psychiatric bills. :)

Robin Mierzejewski: TOO FUNNY! He's going to be fine. My sister went to Argentina and she is still kickin'. :-)

Holly Azbill Garcia: My baby bro was at that mission....plus my niece is there now. So awesome!! Congrats guys.

Jathon Strauss: Congratulations Shannon! That is the same mission I served in, Buenos Aires North. I loved it and would be happy to answer any questions you can't find on the internet:)

Alta Batterman: That's great! He'll do just fine. The Lord will be with him!

Rebecca Bautista Cothran: Just think you have another country to visit now..Don't worry too much, the Lord protects his missionaries.

Audra Olsen: Yea!!! Congradulations!!! Shannon, you are hilarious!!!

Brandy Griffin Fox: You sound like my mom. ;-D

Kori Jean Olsen: How exciting! We are so proud of him!!!!!! Congratulations!

I googled how to get from Austin, TX to Argentina...you know, just in case I have to go over there quickly and Google maps said "We could not calculate directions between Austin, TX and Argentina." Well...what is that supposed to mean?! Can you be sent to a place that Google can not calculate directions to? How am I going to get to him if I need to?

Oh, and a few things to point out from the video:

No, Jared is not a monk...he's just wearing a blanket over his head.
Yes, Emily can be sarcastic.
No, Kinsey was not excited to be there.
Yes, I did lose 45 lbs last year...my 5 chins just did not get the memo!
Yes, it is cheesy to add "I hope they call me on a mission" music to the video but give me a break...he's my first one to go on a mission.
No, Jared did not guess Argentina...he guessed South America.
Yes, Jared did say that Gary owed him five dollars for guessing right.
Yes, Jared then changed it to ten dollars at the end of the video.
Yes, Emily called him on it!
Yes, I laugh every time I watch it.
Yes, Carson was very excited to be there because he got to see his Chris!

Oh, and yes...we are so proud of Chris!

The moral of the story....

shhhh...he'll tell you in the morning.

February - Just the Best Month EVER!

GROUNDHOGS I'm not sure how much wisdom there is in letting a furry creature decide how long the winter will be but he said that winter is over and I'm all for that! Spring has sprung here in Texas and the gloom and doom that settled over me in October has up and left. I love spring!! Thank you Punxsutawney Phil.

LOVE Valentine's Day. The holiday for lovers.

Okay...I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Lover...that word makes my skin crawl.

The holiday for love. That's better!

I gave Gary my Valentine/birthday wish list.

Kindle: I love to read but I am going blind (not really, I'm being over-dramatic...I'm just getting old). I haven't read a book in a long time because they are making the print much smaller than they used to and I can't see it!

On the Kindle you can make the print GIGANTIC so old, umm I mean blind people like me can see it.

A vinyl cutter: It cuts vinyl and other stuff I think.

Gary is the practical sort and doesn't see the need for surprises so he went to work and asked one of his co-workers about the Kindle and then called me all excited to tell me about it. He thought I would be thrilled.

I got mad at him.

I quit speaking to him.

Then, on a two hour road trip, I told him how he had ruined every single holiday for the last 20 years with his practical-ness! This is the response I got from him.

?????????????????????????

He was befuddled! Confused! Dumb-founded!

I was angry about something completely unrelated to the Kindle incident and took it out on him. For two hours. On the way to the temple. The loveliest place on earth.

I regret that. I love my husband. He deserves so much more than a mean and cranky wife!

He loves me too and he forgave me.

He's also tricky. He found the Kindle at Target and gave it to me the day before Valentine's Day. He also brought me flowers and a card. Surprise!! I really was surprised because Gary is internet-buying challenged and I thought he would say "I got you a Kindle for Valentine's Day so go ahead and order yourself one" but he found one, bought it, and put it in a gift bag with a card inside. I read the card and cried because even when I am mean he still loves me!

We celebrated Valentine's Day in style with a candlelight, Chinese take-out dinner. Candlelight dinners are always so romantic.....especially with four children. I spent most of the night saying "don't light your napkin on fire" and "quit dipping your fingers in the hot wax"! We gave each of the kids a can of refried beans and a bag of chocolate. They were ecstatic! Nothing says "I love you" like a can of beans!

PRESIDENTS My claim to fame is that I share a birthday with the first president of the United States. I always thought that was pretty cool. Gary had the day off but the kids didn't! He had a list of chores that he was planning on doing and spending time with me was not on the list. I guess I can't blame him though since spending time with me sometimes involves me getting mad at him. My birthday dinner and dessert was on his list of chores though! He spent part of his day off making food for me. Happy Birthday to good ole' George and Abe. Thanks for giving us a reason to have a day off while the kids were in school! You two are awesome!

BIRTHDAYS I have always celebrated my birthday with my sister. She liked to think of it as a birthmonth instead of just birthday! I think she also thought that it was HER month but I was here first so I insisted that she share! She could have the first two weeks and I got the last two weeks. Then we just decided to compromise and have everyone lavish us with gifts all month long! She is no longer here on earth to celebrate birthdays with me which always makes me sad. My friend stopped by on Lori's birthday to bring me a late Valentine treat. It was just a coincidence but I like to think that I was being blessed with chocolate covered strawberries and words of encouragement to help cheer me up on that sad day! Gary made stir-fry just the way I like it...no veggies, just rice and meat. He also made red velvet cupcakes in a jar with cream cheese frosting. So yummy! My friends and family helped me feel so loved. I was spoiled rotten this year. I am so grateful!

BANQUET Blue and Gold. We have once again entered into the land of Pinewood Derbys and Blue and Gold Banquets. Carson loves Cub Scouts. This year's theme was Cowboys and Indians. His den did a skit. Scene: Cowboys on one side shooting guns at the Indians, Indians on the other side shooting arrows at the cowboys. Just at the point that things are getting pretty scary, in walks the hero (Carson) who throws his hands out and says "BOP" (which is "STOP" in Carson-ese) and then he said "let's be friends!" The cowboys and Indians see the error of their ways, they put their arms around each other and walk off into the sunset. Cue the applause! So cute!

I will spare you the details of what happened before the banquet started...let's just say it had to do with poop. My friend told me I was going to heaven. Gary is not so sure about that but hey, it's my birthmonth I can dream if I want to!

Goodbye February, thanks for the memories. I look forward to seeing you again next year.