A Peek Inside My Head

I always have strange thoughts running through my head. It's a good thing I'm quiet or people would think I am crazy. Sometimes, I start to write a post and never finish it. These are some of the posts I've started in the last few months. Remember, it's not nice to judge!

Facing My Fears. That's all I wrote...just a title. I think it was about driving to the dentist. The roads here in Texas are tall. They have 3-4 roads stacked on top of each other. Every time I go to the dentist I have to go on the very top road. Every time I go on that very top road I think how easy it would be to drive right over the edge. There is only a 2 foot concrete wall keeping me from driving to my death and I'm not even suicidal! Think about if I was. That wall does not comfort me one little bit. One day I drove to the dentist without thinking about falling to my death. Now that's progress! My mom thinks I should quit going to the dentist.

My husband is trying to kill me. Tonight I decided to play the piano while I waited for the slowest kid on the planet to get ready to go to a friend's house. I was supposed to leave to get Kinsey from youth night so I asked slow kid to hurry. I was in the middle of playing a song that I have been practicing on the piano so I told him we would leave when I finished. Just as I got to the ff part of the song...the big finish...my husband comes up behind me and yells "SHANON, IT'S 8:23. DON'T YOU NEED TO LEAVE?" I'm not kidding...his hands were cupped around his mouth and he was screaming! I think my heart stopped beating for a few seconds. I still can't play that part of the song without twitching.

No Title. My jaw hurts. Really bad. A constant ache that does not go away even when I take 800 mg of ibuprofen. I went back to the dentist today so he could see what was wrong. He still thinks it's because I clench my teeth. I think it's because he shot my nerve and it's mad. Either way, I would really like for someone to chop my head off or maybe shoot me. A month later and it still hurts, but only sometimes. I have sworn off ibuprofen though because I'm pretty sure I have some horrible liver disease.

Four Eyes. Back in December, I took all of my children to the eye doctor. Emily was really hoping that she would need glasses, but in a cruel twist of fate, she has 20/20 vision. A couple months after her appointment she started reading lots. She had her nose in a book all the time. I had to make her go outside to play. I am sooooo mean! She also started saying that she couldn't see the board at school. She told everyone she met that she couldn't see far away. I had moms and teachers from both school and church asking me if I knew that she couldn't see. I had my suspicions that she really just wanted glasses so I kept putting it off. Then Gary decided to take matters in his own hands and make an appointment for her. Turns out...I was right! She still has 20/20 vision. Thankfully the doctor gave her a good lecture on telling the truth and how awful bad vision is once you get over the coolness of glasses. My daughter is a good...ummm...non-truth teller. If only my husband had listened to my mother's intuition. He could have saved that $29. I would NEVER say "I told you so" though because that would not be nice.

No Title.


I'm not sure why I had a picture of my feet on my blog, but there you go. My feet. Funny story. At least I can laugh about it now...on a good day. In junior high (that's what 8th-9th grade was called waaay back when) I had a melt down one morning before school (actually it happened regularly because I hated school). I was crying uncontrollably when my mom came in to see why I was so upset. With tears streaming down my face I pointed to my feet and said "myyyyy feeettt aarrrreee uuuggggleeee!" I don't remember what she said but I think her standard response was "you are beautiful...do you need to stay home from school today?" My mom had the same hatred of school that I had so she let me stay home a lot. She's nice that way. I love my mom! I make my kids go to school even when they are sick. I am mean that way. In all fairness, though, I've been crazy for a long time. My kids are pretty normal...I think.

Did You Know? Ummm....obviously, I didn't know either because that's all I wrote. Weird!

The People in the Audience Are Screaming At Me. Long story short, I was invited to go see Twilight. I haven't read the books or seen the movies so I hesitated, but thought it would be nice to get out of my chair so I said yes. My plan was to rent the movies and watch them before I went. The day of the big Girl's Night Out I still hadn't seen the movies so Kinsey and I went to Blockbuster to rent them. We searched all over for those movies but couldn't find them so we asked for help. Then the employee searched all over and finally found them right in front of our face. I went to pay for them and my credit card was denied so I gave them another one and that one was denied too! Then she took my card and walked to the other side of the desk to make a phone call! I was thinking that the police were going to come and I was going to be arrested for stealing my own credit card. I was starting to panic when she said "okay, it will go through later tonight" When I asked her why my credit cards were denied she said all calm like "oh, our system is messed up." There I was a stressed out puddle on the floor! As I was walking to the car I told Kinsey that the audience watching my life movie was screaming at me. "Don't watch those movies!" I couldn't watch them...after all, I've seen a suspenseful movie before! I'm not dumb enough to go in there! Yeah....I couldn't watch Lost either. I was so stressed by the end of each hour that I had a headache. Wimp!

So there you go. A peek inside my head. Scary, isn't it?! I was just telling someone yesterday that my anxiety was all under control. I didn't need that darn anti-anxiety medicine. After reading my thoughts from the last few months, I'm starting to wonder. What do you think? Oh, never mind, don't answer that!